Big Turnout at HPT HPT returned to its home base last night. theHost fired up the crock pot and invited the following donkeyfied players:

flyingDane
Cooper
BMW
MarkyMark
Mr.Vegas
SonofVegas
LetsChat
MillionDollarMan
Me
WallyBall (second game)

By 6:30, slow cooked meatballs hit the air.
At 6:35, cards are in the air. I fold.
At 6:36, BMW and flyingDane are playing "tight."
The Dane's flush beats Beemer's two pair.
At 6:38, I fold. Cooper and the Dane mix it up. Trips are good for the Dane.
6:39, oh, I guess I will fold.
Good fuggin thing.
Cooper and Vegas mix it up. The board has four clubs of the A345 variety. I am guessing this is a battle to see who has the biggest club. Vegas is betting hard. Cooper (AKA the Rock) is right with him at the turn. By the river, I had figured it out. Vegas shows Qc (2nd NUT). Cooper shows, wait...

THE 2 OF CLUBS!

for the straight flush.

Next fuggin hand...
I fold. Cooper and Vegas are heads up again on a four club board. Indeed, Vegas holds the Queen and takes it down.

Someone check Vegas' pockets.

Me for the next few orbits:
fold, fold, fold, fold, fold, fold, folditty-fold-fold

Time out for a coffee update:
I go over to the Dunkin'. Some poncho wearing, fat arse, bucket head is chatting with some lady in line. As I try to navigate around her, um, personage, she makes her move and cuts me off. She didn't have to do alot to box me out of line but she did it and she did it quickly. It is fat fugs like this that make me wish I had my baseball bat on hand all the time.

7:30 or thereabouts LetsChat takes the lead pipe to theHost and BMW with the Nut Flush. All together now:
Nice hand, LetsChat.

you suck.

7:40 I get the hammer and raise it up to 5xBB. SonofVegas calls. Flop has 7. I check like the pussy I am and he goes all in. Yup, he pushed me off it with his sixes. I AM WEAK AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT.

7:45 flyingDane and me hook up. He bumps it up weakly from early position. I am sitting in the BB and I bet about the pot. I am committed here. He sees something with my play and pushes. I call. His 8s vs. my 3s. I don't improve and I AM OUT THIRD FROM THE BOTTOM.

Later on, Dane was telling me that I appeared to be stuck on whether to call or raise, so he figured I had a low pair. Good Eyes, flyingDane.

About half an hour later, the four losers (Mr. Vegas is our addition) line up for another "winner take all" tournament. Only one highlight:

BMW and I are in a pot. I have Qd10x on a flop of Qx10dxd. BMW pushes his straight. I call with my two pair and four to the flush. Turn does not help but, here it comes...

River is a lovely diamond. And I yell the immortal..

Flush, Flush, give it to me!!!!

Not only am I weak, but I am an arsehole. Sorry about the outburst.

BMW was cool. He took the suckout like a man. He should be applauded.

For my part, it will be a long time before I live it down.

Back to the main tourney:
8:30 We have three survivors,
LetsChat - crushing table with run of good cards/good play,
Cooper - crushing posers that try to knock her off her hands (right Dane?),
MillionDollarMan - looking for something to crush.

MillionDollarMan gets knocked out in third. The dude takes a two month hiatus and moneys...
That is something to byatch about.

8:50 Mr. Vegas and I chop $20 in the side tourney, so it wasn't all bad.

9:00 LetsChat levels Coopers 4s on the turn. We have a winner.

What are the lessons for our crew so far.
1.) LetsChat is playing well and on a rush. Just remember to bring cash next time, dear.
2.) I am an arsehole.
3.) Your nut flush will not play, sir.
4.) Jockeying for position at the Dunkin' is not cool. Especially, when you really should be avoiding doughnuts dear.


WallyBall is added for the second game. He, Dane, MarkyMark, and me are clustered in one corner of the table. Let's call the corner "The Corner of Poker Death." Only one of us would make the first division.
Wally got the knock first, but before he did a crash and burn, he suggested a format change.

CASH GAME!

I might be down with that, we will see.
I think his suggestion might have been caused by
1.) laying down 75o that would have turned a full house.
2.) pushing a weak ace before the blinds ate him up.

I'm next on the launching pad when LetsChat's 9s stand up to my "push/prayer" Q10s. I don't improve.
Bye bye.

Mark is next. MM is gone.

By this time, it is theFlyingDane, theHost, and LetsChat left. I don't know how the Dane got the boot because Daddy is tired and must get up in the morning.

However, I have from my source that LetsChat and theHost were the last two soldiers.

It broke down thusly:
1.) LetsChat has a 5-1 chip lead.
2.) LetsChat is getting tired.
3.) theHost hunkers down and shows his determination by "beering up" around midnight.

LetsChat is discombobulated by this display of sticktoitiveness and loses.

But that was after his most memorable moment:

While three way, 600/300 blinds, LetsChat pops it up a couple grand. theHost calls and flyingDane is
down. On a QJQ flop, theHost pushes and LetsChat goes into the tank...

He sits there and thinks...
thinks...
thinks...
I finish a couple a beers,
yeah, he's still thinking...

Finally, he calls and flips a Queen and a Jack.

theHost flips a K6 and throws his chips at LetsChat.

Now that is your "uncool" moment of the night. I am relieved because the shame is lifted from my shoulders.

As for LetsChat, well played sir, well played.

Results for the evening.

LetsChat makes booku cash.
962 meatballs eaten.
1,543 chips thrown.
2,245 f-bombs dropped (2000 by me). Sorry Cooper.
10,435 ounces of beer consumed.
1 phone call from Mrs. Friendly.
A million laughs.

Back to work.  ¶ 11:21 AM